Wednesday, June 29, 2011

is there a doctor in the house?

Little Hoot is having surgery. It seems that his wing is hanging off. Little Hoot is a little bit worried, but he shouldn't be. Wee Small informs me that Manatee will be performing the operation.

Manatee has apparently admitted that he hasn't performed any surgical tasks ever, but not to worry, he is a very good doctor.

Little Hoot is lying on the operation table. There are a lot of buzzing noises - these come from Wee Small's mouth (she is assisting Dr. Manatee with the operation). It seems Manatee is performing the operation using a knitting needle.

"Is that the right way to operate?" I ask.
"Yes," replies Wee Small. "Little Hoot can't feel anything. He is frozen solid."
"Err, well, lucky for him I suppose."
"Yes," continues Wee Small "Manatee is using those tweezers that doctors use. What are those tweezers called?"
"Err... tweezers?" I guess
"Well," says Wee Small "Manatee doesn't have any of those tweezers so he is using a peg."
"And Manatee is fixing hoot with the peg," she continues "...and he is also using the peg to get rid of Little Hoots fleas."
"He has fleas?!?!"
"Yes, lots of fleas. Look at all the big fleas that Manatee found."

Wee Small shows me some fluff.

"Ahh... " I reply with relief, "Well that must feel better for Little Hoot, but I thought he needed his wing fixed."
"We're not up to the Wing. We are up to the fleas. It's very serious. He needs to go into the squishing machine."
"The squishing machine?!?"
"Yes , he is a little thin. He needs to be nice and fat. This is going to hurt a lot."
"The squishing machine?" I repeated
"And NOW!" Wee Small shouts, "Manatee WILL FIX Hoot's wing in TEN SECONDS FLAT!"
"What happened to the squishing machine?" I repeat. Wee Small ignores this.
"La la la la la la LA LA" sings Wee Small, "la la la LA LA."

Little Hoot falls off the operating table and onto the floor. Wee Small is not happy about that. It seems that this will hinder Manatee's attempt to fix Little Hoot's wing in ten seconds flat.

"Okay! Let's do this properly now!" she states with a certain grim determination. Does that mean it wasn't being fixed properly before?

"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight..."

Wee Small realizes at this point that it is going to take Manatee more than ten seconds.

"...nine, NiiiNNE, um....,nnnnniiiiinnnne, um ....nnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeee, nnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeee, nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnNNNNNNNNNnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiIIIIIIIIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnNnNNNnNnNnNnNnNnNNnnNnNnnnnNNNNNNNNNNNNnnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeeeeeee!"

Wee Small is running out of breath making that 9th second last for minutes.

And at this point of the operation I was called away urgently to perform some more mundane duties, and missed the thrilling conclusion. Later on I asked Wee Small how did it go.

"Oh Little Hoot was alright," she remarks casually, "except that he fainted."
"Was it the shrinking machine?" I asked. I just can't let that go.
"No! It was because he had just had his wing stitched up." replied Wee Small "And Dr. Manatee said he had to stay in bed for three days or he'd get angry with Hoot."

I am pretty certain that Little Hoot did not follow Dr. Manatee's advice. I don't think it matters much as Dr. Manatee is a quack.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Mistaken identity

One day whilst preparing a roast dinner I sensed that something was not right, that someone was unhappy.

Call it intuition.
I looked to see who was upset.

It was Manatee.

He wasn't moving, but he gazed at me with one fierce eye to indicate that he was displeased with the roast dinner and in particular what I was about to do to a sweet potato.

One look at the sweet potato and it was obvious.

I apologized immediately to Manatee and gave him the sweet potato. He didn't say anything but I could tell he was relieved.

Moments later I saw them outside playing together.

It seems Manatee thinks of the sweet potato as another manatee - perhaps a little brother or a friend.

Well I suppose I could roast some turnips instead.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

overdue introductions

Wee Small likes to spend all of her time barefoot. Her toes need to be in constant touch with the earth. However, it is winter on tummy mountain, which means sometimes I insist on shoes and socks. The kind without holes.

And sometimes we have to buy new socks.

The Little One (being the eldest) and Wee Small made Little Hoot out of Wee Small's new socks. They think I don't know that.

The Little One (being the eldest) made the body. And Wee Small did the eyes and wings.

introducing Little Hoot

I don't know where the little ones have put the other sock. They must have disposed of the evidence.

Thursday, June 9, 2011